The Long Term Benefits of Psychotherapy
A prospective client asks him or herself, "Is psychotherapy worth the investment of time and money?"
Santayana's
famous quote is "those who fail to learn the lessons of history are bound
to repeat them." In essence, psychotherapy is learning the lessons of
personal history so that we have increased freedom to shape our lives. online marriage
counseling
Skillful
therapists are teachers and problem-solvers in the domain of emotions and
relationships. This is a very powerful domain, but it is so ever present that
it is often in the background of awareness, like the blue sky or dark night. Psychotherapy
We
all live in a complex web of relationships. Growing up in our family we learn
both helpful, positive lessons and also un-helpful, negative lessons. Every
family story has themes that are passed down through the generations. Some of
these themes are very positive, "work hard and do your best",
"never tell a lie", "treat others as you would have them treat
you." marriage counseling
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However,
there are also unhappy and hurtful themes, "kill the pain with drink or
drugs", "it's OK to take out your rage on others", "don't
tell anyone if you are mistreated or abused."
Each
of us enters adulthood with a mixed bag of positive and negative themes and we
try our best to get along in the world. We are only partially aware of the
negative themes and are often blindsided when a negative theme plays out in our
lives. We act out the negative theme and we end up making a bad decision or we
hurt someone we love or we self-defeat. marriage counseling
The
painful problem that brings a client to therapy is valuable because it is an
expression, an example of the troubling patterns that reside out of awareness.
Seeking therapy is a great opportunity to bring negative themes into awareness,
to put them into words and see them in action. the marriage counselor
A
skilful therapist is trained to be an active listener and is able to put
together the pieces of the puzzle. The therapist helps the client to self
observe, to name and describe negative patterns of behaviour. Naming and
describing brings self defeating behaviour out of the shadows and into
awareness. Once in awareness the client is in a position to make a change.
The
therapist can't prescribe solutions, each person is unique. The job of the
therapist is to help the client formulate his or her own creative solution and
to practice more rewarding behaviour.
If
a person changes course by only a few degrees, it makes a big difference in the
span of a life-time. Each generation sits on the shoulders of the prior
generation. If the person seeking psychotherapy has a child or children then
that parent's increased self-awareness will be a huge gift to the child.
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